The 5 Best (and Worst) Things About Teaching Science

As we approach summer and leave our classrooms behind for a couple months, I realize that teaching science is an awesome gig, but it also has some pitfalls I've experienced firsthand this year. Indulge me while I reflect...

The Five Worst Things About Teaching Science

1. You may have to teach 30 students how to light a Bunsen burner incendiary device before they are old enough to drive a car.

2. The out-of-pocket costs for hands-on activities can get a little extreme, and you can catch some serious shade from the grocery store clerk for buying 32 bags of M&M's at the same time, even though you tell her they aren't all for you. 

3. Politics and opinions can inhibit your ability to objectively teach climate change, evolution, and deep time. 

"Mrs. Freeman, do you believe that dinosaurs actually existed?" 

Um, YES! 

4. The time required for prepping and cleaning up labs can rack up some serious overtime hours.

I wish it were as easy as adding food dye to flasks! SMH.

5. There's always one or two (or seven) kids that would rather walk across hot coals than wear safety goggles. 

Say it with me now, "PUT YOUR GOGGLES BACK ON!" 
Ah, a phrase I shall not utter again until August...

The Five Best Things about Teaching Science

1. You can say things like "I need more alcohol for my lesson" and not get fired. 

2. You get to boggle kids' minds like a magician, but *bonus* you get to have the pleasure of explaining your tricks.

3. You get to wear a spiffy lab coat and goggles. Who else gets to look this cool at work?

4. Your lessons get to involve food! Whether it's making ice cream for a colligative properties lab, using goldfish in your data collection lesson, or popping corn to teach mass percent; other subjects may have class parties, but you you've got snacks with a purpose. 

5. You get paid to blow things up. Enough said.

Regardless of it's ups and downs, we all know science teachers have the best job. Happy summer, fellow science teachers!

Cheers,
Brandie 

An "Alternative" Teacher Appreciation Week for Non-Educators

Some people just don't get it. 

Tuesday, May 9 is National Teacher Appreciation Day in the United States. While many schools celebrate their staff all week, from an informal survey I conducted, it would appear that a larger number of educators receive no special recognition or gifts, whatsoever. 

As a high school teacher, gifts from students are sparse, but my school does a commendable job celebrating us.
  

As my principal says on a regular basis, "you will never be fully appreciated for the work you do." 

But, I think we could help the general public to understand what it is like to be a teacher in 2017 through an "alternative" Teacher Appreciation Week for non-educators. It would look something like this:

Monday:

Go to Target with your own children to buy school supplies. Put what they need in the upper compartment of the cart and then fill the lower portion with necessities for 30-150 children who don't live with you. 

As you throw in markers, pencils, paper, etc., take the time to explain to a stranger who is buying supplies for their child that a spiral notebook is not the same as a composition book. Then, chase down your own toddler who escaped while you were counting out 32 blue 3-prong folders. 

Even though you'll spend about $500, keep your receipts because the same Congressman whose starting salaries are $174,000 (while yours is $36,000) generously allow you to deduct half of that on your taxes.

Tuesday:

Bummer, you've come down with a stomach bug. Email your boss and let them know you'll be out, and then go back to bed.

JUST KIDDING!

Between "runs" to the bathroom, call 27 strangers until you find one that is available to come and do your job for the day.

In detail, use the last bit of your strength to explain to them the ins-and-outs of your schedule and what they need to do to be a substitute for you. 

Come back to work the next day with a ton of paperwork to sort through, a few vague notes on what happened, and a foreboding email from your boss stating that you need to come and speak with them.

Wednesday:

Do all states do this,
or just Georgia?

You just found out that the branch of the retail company you work for isn't performing as well as those stores that are in more affluent areas. 

Remember, it's your fault that the amount of disposable income in your town is low and the tax base is lacking.

Even though you've been doing an average of 13 hours of overtime a week (for free!), your work place is put on a PUBLIC list of "chronically failing" locations. 

That'll be sure to boost your morale, increase productivity, and reassure customers. Bet you can't wait to go to work tomorrow!

Thursday:

This morning's meeting is a tough one. You just found out that one of the employees you manage lost their mom. Along with another employee who has a chronic illness, your end-of-quarter performance reports are going to be down if you don't start drilling the basics of sales into their heads over and over and over. 

The data for their performance is what matters most- not what they are struggling with as people! 

If they don't perform, you could lose your job. Make sure they know that and are aware they won't get promoted if they don't meet those subjective benchmarks. 

The stress is sure to make them feel valued and comfortable while being assessed, and they'll do their best.

Friday:

Today is a big day: you just found out the board of directors is voting on a new CEO of the corporation. 

How exciting! 

I am sure they will have your best interest at heart when they appoint someone. To your dismay, however, you find out who they hired has never worked for your company and has NO experience in your field. 

You and the 3.1 million other employees at your company- EVERY SINGLE ONE of you- is more qualified than her. 

No worries, though. Her family gave huge charitable donations to fund some additions to the corporate office, so she must be alright. Right? 

Right?

While I know that no one could understand our station in life in a week's time, I can dream... 

The Future Educators Association at my
school allows students to purchase
dress-down days for staff. 

Wishing you all a happy Teacher Appreciation Week full of blue jeans, crayon art, and free meals at fast food locations.

Cheers,
Brandie